Hard To See
by I shipp lizter
Summary: Esme gets to see her new granddaughter. But instead if celebrating, she becomes overwhelmed by her human memories, and runs off into the forest. Set in Breaking Dawn Part One.
1. Chapter 1

Esme's POV

Carlisle and I had just shown up after our hunt and fought off the wolves. I was surprised when I found out Jacob had imprinted on Renesmee.

The wolves had left and Carlisle went with Edward to check on Bella. I had no idea if she was alive or not. I went inside with Alice, Jasper, And Emmett. I followed the sound of a heartbeat into our living room. Rosalie was sitting by the fireplace with something in her arms. As I got closer she looked up at me.

"Esme, meet your granddaughter, Renesmee" Rosalie said. She handed the bundle to me, and I held Renesmee in my arms. She was so beautiful. Mesmerizing. She looked just like Bella, and had so many of Edwards features. I was looking down at her and my vision clouded over. All my human memories flooded my mind. My beautiful baby boy who never even got a chance at life. The baby I held was now replaced with my own. How could I let my memories get the best of me. A voice brought me back to reality,

"Mom!" Rosalie said. I gasped and looked up. She was holding Renesmee again. Was I that sucked into my past that I hadn't realized she taken the baby from me? "Mom, are you ok?" Rosalie asked. I looked her in the eyes,

"I can't do this," I said. I turned and bolted. I couldn't be here right now. I just wasn't ready to look at another child. I ran deeper into the forest until I got to the border line. Trapped. I couldn't go any further. I sat down on the edge of the riverbank as tearless sobs shook my body. It just wasn't fair. Why was Bella so lucky to have her baby when I couldn't even have mine. I hated the thought of avoiding my granddaughter, but she reminded me to much of William. I don't know how long I sat there sobbing. Wishing all my pain would go away.


	2. Chapter 2

Carlisle's POV

I was checking up on Bella and asking Edward what had happened, when Rosalie burst into the room with Renesmee,

"Carlisle, we've got a problem." She said. My first thought was that something happened to the baby, but before I could ask, she continued, "Esme, just had some kind of meltdown, and then ran off into the forest!" she said. She looked worried so I knew it had to be serious.

"Thanks Rosalie. I'll go after her" I said standing up. I ran out the door into the trees, following Esme's scent. What could have possibly upset her so much that she would run from her own home. I tracked her scent to the edge of our territory. There she was, sitting on the ground, sobbing. I rushed up to her and wrapped my arms around her.

"Esme, sweetheart, what's the matter?" I asked. I stood her up and she threw her face into my chest and sobbed even harder. I held her tight, and rubbed her back, trying to calm her down. After about five or six minutes she had calmed down and looked up at me.

"I'm just a little upset over the baby" she said, "It's nothing"

"What do you mean nothing? You ran from your own home. It clearly is something" I said. I wanted to help her and I needed to know. She sighed and gave in.

"Its just not fair. Bella gets her baby, and I could even get mine." she said. So I thought. Every baby she sees makes her upset.

"Esme, I know your upset. And I know why. I'm sorry that Renesmee makes you feel that way." I said, trying my hardest to comfort her.

"Its not your fault. I was changed in a hormonal mess. And I'm stuck with it forever. Maybe if I had waited before I tried to kill myself,...Then I wouldn't end up falling apart every time I see a baby." she said. I hated to hear her talk about that.

"If you had waited. I wouldn't have been there to save you." I told her. It was true. The night I saved her was my last night at the hospital before Edward and I were to move.

"Then I guess I'm glad I chose that time," she said. She looked up at me and smiled a little. I leaned in and kissed her. Her arms trailed up to my neck. I lost track of how long we ha been kissing. We broke apart and I looked down at her.

"Better?" I asked. She smiled,

"Yea" We linked hands and slowly walked back to the house. Everything would be ok.


End file.
